I had a panic attack today, at home. I was relieved that it didn’t last a horribly long time. I don’t even know what set it off, other than I had an upset stomach and was kind of stressed out from a conversation I’d had with my mother earlier in the day.
I was just sitting on my bed, realized I was hungry, went to go find food, and just got really confused, nauseous and dizzy. I kind of stumbled around the kitchen, breathing quickly and feeling that awful terror feeling rising up in my being. I was so caught off guard by the feeling, that I just went into instant panic mode.
I began to feel so unreal.
My mind started looping, wondering why I’m a human being, why human beings exist, etc. etc.
Wondering what my purpose on the planet is.
Wondering if I’m losing my mind.
Spiraling, in loops, in circles.
Too many questions, not enough answers.
I ate some lentil soup, and played Tetris to try to make myself stop thinking.
I calmed down.
I don’t like that I had a panic attack today, but I am glad that I was able to make it go away with some effort.
So, I started reading “No Exit” By Jean-Paul Sartre tonight.
I’m really enjoying it so far.
Hell is other people.
– Jean-Paul Sartre
Thanks for reading. ❤ Artemis